There was a moment in my life when I was so confused why I can’t stay away from my friends. I worked very far away from here, away from them. Then, I got lonely and scared that I was loosing intimacy with them. So I gave up my job and returned.
I made a journey to reach myself inside and discovered that in high school I met a lot of friends. As a very young boy at a fledging age my concept of friendship was only limited to having mates for childish video games, for movie watching, for conversations about crushes and love interests, and for many other juvenile activities. To me that time, the meaning of trust, honesty, reliance, love, and care which are some of the essentials to the foundation of friendship were bluntly defined.
Then college days happened. It was hard for me to get over with my high school friends because I thought it was the perfect relationship I have had with anybody or any group for that matter. I didn’t forget them but I just found new ones. As I met new acquaintances in the university, some things about me changed. I learned to like things I didn’t even care about back in high school. My new friends made me realize and helped me discover things about myself which made my life a lot better. These are the people I now call my dearest and closest friends.
My relationship with them is very kaleidoscopic. Our moments together are a mixture of laughter and tears, love and hatred, fun and boredom, disputes and reconciliation. Differences in personality, thoughts, views, upbringing, and attitude sometimes make us clash and fight over the simplest issues. It is with them, however, that I experienced the happiest moments of my life. It was them who gave me so much light and inspiration when life got gloomy. It was them who accepted me without conditions when others rejected. It was them who remembered me when everyone else forgot. It was them who in one way or another made my life bearable during moments of misery and desolation. Their existence in my life is both fascinating and repulsive.
Our friendship was and even until now never perfect and ideal. So I began to understand that there is no such thing as a perfect friendship and no explicit standards for real friendship. It is only a matter of learning how to intensify our appreciation for the friends we have, then, love and enjoy them for what they are. After all, friends are the best gifts anyone can have. Without a doubt, these friends are the best gifts I have ever received in my life. They may not qualify to the standards of “real friends” set by experts on relationships, they may not be perfect friends in any sense, but they are the best I have. This is probably the reason why I can never stay away from them and just like any other gifts I have received, I don’t intend to loose them.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
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